Hey Mama,
You’re doing great. You’re raising your business and your babies simultaneously. You’re doing hard things daily. You’re being stretched and forced in grow (physically and mentally) in ways you never knew were possible. You’re basically Super Woman.
But, I want to ask you, how is your self-care? Non-existent?
When was the last time you got a break? You don’t remember?
Can you take a deep breath? Are you suffocating with anxiety?
I’ve been there. I used to be you and that didn’t work for me and it doesn’t work for you, no matter how hard you try to convince yourself otherwise. The late night/early morning feedings, the demanding threenagers, the housework, the lunch packing, all on top of owning your own business. It’s hard. And it can be draining. And you can lose yourself in it.
I want you to know that this season of life is temporary, yes, but it can also permanently damage so many things. Your relationship with your sweet husband. Your self-worth. Your health. So many things can be affected by this season of life. There are such extreme highs, and also extreme lows.
When I first started my business I worked all day and all night. I worked constantly. I thought that I would force my business into submission and it would magically start producing income. I sacrificed quality time with my friends, I got frustrated with my infant son for crying, and I made myself a nervous lunatic.
I was a hot mess.
And it was a badge I wore with honor. Here I was, proud of my hot mess-ness.
But here’s the thing, my business didn’t make any money the first year. It wasn’t that I had a bad business model, it wasn’t that I didn’t have the skill or talent to run a successful business, it was that I wore that “hot mess mom” badge with so much honor. I had perfect branding, on-point copy, my website oozed serenity.
Then potential clients would get on a Skype call with me and they would find a disheveled mom who hadn’t changed out of her yoga pants for 5 days with smeared mascara across her cheek and spit-up on her shirt.
I didn’t match that confident, calm person on my website.
I knew I was a mess, but I didn’t really want to admit it. I knew how my inner turmoil felt to others. And now looking back on it, I know why I had absolutely no clients. It was me. No one else to blame but myself.
I had let myself go so far down the “hot mess mom” road that I had no idea who I was.
So I finally took my husband’s advice and asked for help. I joined a gym that had a childcare option and started going for 30 minutes three times a week. And things started to change. I saw myself as an individual who was a mom, not a mom who used to be an individual. I started cooking fresh food, instead of hitting the Chick-fil-A drive through. I started reading books that didn’t have illustrations and required me to think. And through all of this, I started to find myself again.
I became more confident in my business and my abilities. I started to assert myself more and take healthy risks. I started to write copy that spoke directly to my target market, unapologetically.
In short, I emerged as myself again. Wholly and unapologetically.
And my business? It started to take off. And flourish. And grow and change along with me. Organically. I attracted clients who were motivated and would pay my fees without batting an eye, instead of needy and clingy clients who asked for discounts.
I now recognize this as self-care and now three years postpartum, realize just how lost in motherhood I had gotten.
It ruled my every move.
My son was the best thing that had ever happened to me, but I let it define me and my self-worth.
I was unnecessarily hard on myself, which pushed me deeper into my hole. It was when I started giving myself some grace and let go of my perfectionist tendencies that I felt alive and fully me again. And it was all through self-care.
So Mama, I know it’s hard and sometimes it’s the absolute last thing you want to do, but have you practiced self-care today? No? Then please stop what you’re doing and do something for you, your future self depends on it.
In health and happiness,
Allison Hardy
Source:
http://nfornest.com/hot-mess-mompreneur/
Allison Hardy is a self-care business coach who helps mompreneurs raise their businesses and babies simultaneously so that they can give and live in the way they most desire. Connect with Allison in her community, Self-Care Simplified, and find her on Facebook and Instagram.
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